Any rough starts with feel good endings?

I know that patience is the key to any & every relationship with a glider & that is the route I am going to stick to.

But I would really appreciate some comfort to get through the roughness of a new scared baby. Left alone to my thoughts & I start to feel that this little one just plain hates me--it also doesn't help that the woman that I bought her from just kept telling me when I picked her up, "she's going to hate, hate, HATE you for a long while, so expect that". (I know animals in general, are incapable of hate--despite that, it's simply not conducive to a new owner's relationship with their pet).

Let me start off with a little background. I am new to being a Sugar Mama. I began thinking about getting one in the beginning of this year, but I've had enough pets throughout my life & a little girl of my own, to know that there is more to it than how cute they are.
I spent the spring/summer reading every thing I could on their species, natural habitat, diet, anatomy, behavior, history in the exotic trade--everything. I decided that I was going to start my search for the new addition to our family. I was fortunate & didn't have to wait long. I knew a woman who owned a little pet shop an hour away (she breeds & sells birds & exotics). A glider pair of hers had just had two little ones, one boy one girl. They were about 2 weeks OOP. I decided on the little boy. for the next 6-7 weeks, I drove out there 3 times a week to spend 2-3 hours a day with my little boy. I got to bring him home October 28th & bonding has been on the easy side. I am currently a stay-at-home mom & student. He spends the days in his bonding pouch with an apple & treats throughout the day. He rarely crabs anymore, & it's only sometimes when I first wake him up. We have tent time & I'm always talking to him. He has even began bonding with my husband & our 4 year old. He never bites aside from sometimes "taste-testing" my fingers.

I had always planned on getting another one so he would have a buddy. So I kept my feelers out for available babies. I came upon a woman a couple hours away who had many for sale. I checked out her page & we talked on the phone. I was interested in a little girl she had that she said had an unusually calm & sweet demeanor. About a week and half later, I drove out to pick her up. I would have preferred to see the type of place the little one was coming from, what her set-up was & all, but the woman didn't want me to see her place so we agreed to meet next to a highway. She was with her older son & as they were attempting to move the baby into the pouch I brought, I saw the hesitation. The son saw his mom's face & reminded her to be careful because the baby had a nasty bite. There was something not right about the whole situation. This was different than what I was told on the phone about this little one, & they claimed to hold all the babies daily. Myself I would expect a bite from a scared baby, but I didn't expect THEM to be afraid of her.

As I drove home, I felt so much concern. I didn't know what to believe or what kind of place she really came from. I thought about the horror stories I read about people being scammed & ending up not with a just-weaned baby, but a much older glider, some even a couple years old! Now, none of that would make me change my mind on this little one, & I definitely wouldn't take her back, no matter how much she cost me. But it still isn't nice to be lied to. And either way, I just don't know anything about this situation really. That's what really bothers me.

I got her her own cage & setup. My boy is fixed but I want to have her start to bond first before attempting to introduce them. After getting her home, I tried to put her in her new cage from the bonding pouch, she high pitch crabbed at me, bit me and then jumped & ran. She was so quick! I didn't even know they could move that fast! She got into another room that was not glider proof & I was panicking trying to catch her before she got into something or got hurt. I tried to throw a towel over her so I could catch her, because I read that that would get her to stop. But she still bolted from under it, crabbing & trying to bite all the way. Eventually I caught her & safely got her into her cage. But I felt terrible all night for having had to put her through that. I gave her a day or so to calm down in her cage & get used to the smells and sounds. I made her yummy dinners & put treats in her cage. She jumped at me every time attempting to bite. After two days, I took her out using a pouch to gently grasp her, & she was biting the cloth really hard. I talked to her softly & got her into her bonding pouch & gave her an apple piece before zipping it closed and placing her under my shirt. She quiet down and we went through the day more or less okay. Until I went to remove her & place her back in the cage--we went through that biting, jumping, running, catching scenario again. Again I felt awful for putting her through such stress. I'm starting to wonder if she can even forgive me for this now. Last night she bit me badly, tore into the tip of my finger pretty deep & it bled for an hour.

Like I said, I know it takes time, smell, & a comforting safe routine. Before she came home I spent a couple nights sleeping with a fleece blanket that I have draped over her cage, I've slept with fleece strips & placed them in all her nest pouches, & I have even invested in the original sugar glider bonding potion, if for the slightest chance it might help.

In reaching out, I'm hoping to hear from you guys about your experiences. Can such a rocky start still have a happy ending?

First off, welcome to Glider Central!!!

Now, click on the blue word bonding either in your post on this one and read the articles in there, they have a ton of great information.

Each glider is unique and as you stated it takes time. Don't rush things, in fact I would back off, don't take her out of the cage/pouch, let her do it on her own. Sit next to the cage, talk softly and let her get used to you and her new home. Offer her treats from outside the cage and let her take them, let her get comfortable with you.

Read those articles and see what questions you have after that, but I wouldn't worry to much at this point, this doesn't seem all that unusual for a glider in a new home.

Post back and best of luck with your new glider.

Phil

Looking forward to your updates!

As far as getting food into her cage without getting bit...can you put it in before she wakes up? Also, which diet are you giving her? I guess I should ask "giving them."

If you are giving mealworms, be sure to save those as treats from you directly only, since they love them so much. If you find that she is biting you when taking them, you could use tweezers.

And yes, there is gonna be a good ending!

But in the meantime, leave your little one in her cage let her get used to the new smells and sounds and her new "trees" ( the humans). For a few days. She is overly stressed.

I have one just like that. Her name is Dot. Our stories are almost identical.

My tablet has already died, so I will get you started, and once this thing charges, I'll give you more.

For now, whatever you do, don't flinch when you get bit, attacked, or anything. Be calm, talk to her softly as you approach the cage. Sing lullabies to her.

When she bites tell her no or "Tss" at her. (Glider language for no).

To be continued.... Sorry this thing has already locked up on me...

When you flinch it's teaching her how to get rid of you.

Bonding.
I'm not sure if you have any blankies yet, they 4" squares of fleece. You will need a few, toss them into your laundry hamper, wear or sleep with them to get your scent on them. IF it is possible, tuck into her sleeping pouch and change at least every other day. This gets her used to your scent.

If that's not possible yet, lay an old tshirt you have worn, folded to where seams, and threads can't be reached over her cage. We usually don't recommend this as they tend to pull it through the bars, but in your case this probably won't happen at first. Make sure it's something that you don't mind a little pee on.

Next I would recommend an open pouch. Like this one:

https://www.google.com/search?q=pouch+protective+gliders&client=tablet-android-samsung&hl=en-US&source=android-browser-type&prmd=sivn&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiVvvaChZ_JAhWGSSYKHX2UBhIQ_AUICCgC#imgrc=N8cIWuSLVu-M-M%3A

I wish I had one for Dot, because it seemed she never slept except for short naps which made her even crabbier!

She needs an extra few days to calm down, then I would try feeding her licky treats from a small spoon (not your fingers at first). Just try to coax her to the front of the cage with honey or yogurt.

I hope the website works. I will continue to look for a better picture.

This will get you started, let us know your progress. Just an FYI, it took Dot about 6 months before she bonded with us. It's still touch and go at times, but we work at her pace. She snaps out of setbacks faster.

Everyone has given you great information. It is sad that you were mislead like that.

It will take time and a lot of patients but she will come around.

After your quarantine period you can start introductions, she will learn from other glider that you are safe.

Keep us updated on your bonding progress, we are here to answer your questions.

great advise!!

I was so scared of that when I got my gliders but honestly all of them have been wonderful. It does take a while for some of them to come around but it sounds like I've been lucky that none of mine have bit me. They sure are active little guys. I'm so sorry the breeder seems to have lied, especially if her temperament was something that had been a selling point. Hopefully things have been going better for you since then.

My little buddy hated me and the universe when I first adopted him. I thought it was always going to be that way, but after a year he ended up being the biggest sweetie ever. He's never bitten me since his early thug days. Don't give up! Patience is everything. This forum is an awesome resource for first time owners. I spent a lot of time stalking the threads for bonding tips. Licky treats and carrying Fevy around helped a lot. She is lucky to have a kind owner looking out for her, despite her grumpyness.

Gliders are funny little creatures when it comes to temperament and personalities

I remember a pair born here years ago, and of the two Little Margaret was the sweetest snuggle bug until she turned one I never could figure out what happened, but she just decided she had no use for the human race other than to feed her and keep their enclosure clean. Other than that, just stay far away from her.

No matter what I did, she would have nothing to do with me, so I simply waited and waited and waited. Took her about two years and one day just like it happened when she turned one, she turned back to Sweet Margaret staying that way until she passed at twelve years

It's one of those mysteries I would love to know the answer for sure

I have heard people on here who have had these similar issues and when I read about them it scared me, but I too am lucky and got a wonderful Glider who has never bit me however for the first week I had to give him space he was scared crabby, and would lunge at hands in cage. Give it time and remember if you have EVER prayed for patience God is answering that through the gliders. TRUST ME!!

sugiemom to Stuart

KEEP COMING BACK

My female was very unhappy at first. I gave her about a week keeping my distance, just getting her used to being in the same room some. Over the next week I came up to the cage and talked to her. The next week or so I gave some snacks when I would come by. A little honey or yogurt, one yogurt drop. She really got to like me then. She just had to trust me, and of course show her my worth as a colony member. I didn't want to let her out for a while because I was afraid of the chasing thing. We took it slow and she did great!

When I first adopted my breeding couple, the male, Aries was aggressively shy and pouch protective. He crabbed and bit me all the time. The female was sweeter and didn't mind being touched so I made a frequent habit of sticking my hand in the bed pouch to pet her or give her head rubs. Once he got used to my hand being in the pouch and not crab, I would give him head rubs too. Added bonus I will give them mealies as a positive reinforcement.