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#1160542 - 08/13/11 01:34 PM When a duo becomes solo..
MissTiesa Offline
Glider Explorer

Registered: 08/21/10
Posts: 310
Loc: Chicago, IL
As many of you might know, last night I discovered one of my babies had died. Now, I'm worried about his mate.

She and Nibbler were inseparable for years. They have always been cage-mates.
So far, Kiki seems to be alright. She's perky, active, and strangely enough, she's opened up to me more already. I've had her since last year and she's always been shy, timid, and not very trusting no matter how much bonding I try to do with her. But ever since last night, I've been holding her as much as I can and she has already seemed to open up to me more.

How can I keep her from being as little depressed as possible. I've heard stories (and personally experienced one) where one of the animals (or even people) die, and then soon after, the other one mysteriously passes on, even though they are completely healthy. They say it's that they die of broken hearts. Of course that's the WORST possible outcome, but I want to make sure that she's happy and doesn't become depressed and stops eating or cleaning herself or anything like that.

Are there certain things I should look for aside from her not eating or cleaning herself? Is there other body language I should watch for?
_________________________
Teresa, non-professional zookeeper.
1 dog-Tippy, 2 cats-Oreo and Jareth, 2 geckos-Zodiac and Palkia, 1 guinea pig-Critter, and 3 amazing gliders!
:glider: Kiki, Simba and Winry
gangel Nibbler (2008-2011) heart You will always be in my heart. Always.

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#1160574 - 08/13/11 02:37 PM Re: When a duo becomes solo.. [Re: MissTiesa]
minkasmom Offline
Serious Glideritis

Registered: 11/08/04
Posts: 5965
Loc: Northeast Indiana
Willy Wonka has lost 2 cagemates (the most recent just a couple weeks ago)...and I saw symptoms being displayed that I just couldn't allow to happen this last time like it had before.

He hardly ate. He wouldn't come out of his pouch when I called his name. He didn't play with anything. He wouldn't run in his wheel. He loved being with me, and didn't want to go back in his cage.

Seriously, you might want to get in touch with Valkyriesmom (Alden in real life) and see if she has a neutered rescue to be a companion for Kiki. She lives around Chicago (sorry that I can't remember the EXACT suburb therein) and could help you. hug2
_________________________
Minkasmom (Papillon Kisses)
Slave to:
28 gliders,
5 cats,
and ONE husband (can't handle two, lol!)
gangel Remembering all my lost loves cry

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#1160631 - 08/13/11 04:46 PM Re: When a duo becomes solo.. [Re: MissTiesa]
MissTiesa Offline
Glider Explorer

Registered: 08/21/10
Posts: 310
Loc: Chicago, IL
Awe that's so sad, Poor Willy frown

Yeah I'm keeping a close eye on her but so far she seems okay. She's actually being more friendly than she used to be.

I do know Alden. I adopted a beautiful WFB joey from her this last spring (Winry). I don't know if I feel comfortable looking for a new companion for her yet. I feel like it would be replacing Nibbler, and no glider could ever do that. I will think on it though, and if more people think the same thing, I will look further into it. I just don't have a job right now because I'm living at home and going to school full time (transferring to a university), so I don't have any money to adopt a new glider. Food's never a problem, and my parents have no problem with helping to take care of finances for the vet and food but I don't think they would be okay with footing the bill for a glider. So unless someone was giving one away for free, I wouldn't be able to anyway.
_________________________
Teresa, non-professional zookeeper.
1 dog-Tippy, 2 cats-Oreo and Jareth, 2 geckos-Zodiac and Palkia, 1 guinea pig-Critter, and 3 amazing gliders!
:glider: Kiki, Simba and Winry
gangel Nibbler (2008-2011) heart You will always be in my heart. Always.

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#1160666 - 08/13/11 06:57 PM Re: When a duo becomes solo.. [Re: MissTiesa]
xSwtxSugaX Offline
Glider Addict

Registered: 11/21/10
Posts: 3456
Loc: Saint Louis MO
I think getting a new friend for her will distract her from the situation. And it wouldnt give her the chance to dwell on losing her best friend. A new friend would never be a replacement, but u cant be there for her 24/7. Do it when you are ready tho. Its a hard step to make but when u have a glider most of the time it needs to be done. Eventually they will get lonely. frown
_________________________
"The purity of a person's heart can be quickly measured by how they regard animals"

*Stitch* :grey: *Button* :wfb: *Charlie* :leu:

Cats: Rista and Cali

~*Stacie*~

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#1160670 - 08/13/11 07:07 PM Re: When a duo becomes solo.. [Re: MissTiesa]
minkasmom Offline
Serious Glideritis

Registered: 11/08/04
Posts: 5965
Loc: Northeast Indiana
I have 19 gliders and each one of them has a piece of my heart. The babies that I've lost (5) all took little pieces of my heart when they crossed over the Rainbow Bridge. No glider will EVER replace another---in my heart OR in my life---and I had NO INTENTION of suggesting that you run out RIGHT NOW and get a "new" one. hug2 No, it's too soon for YOU...you need time to grieve. (And if you were within arm's reach, I'd offer you a few more hug2 hug2 and a Kleenex box.)

WHEN YOU ARE READY, I'm sure that you would be able to get a companion for free...Alden was the FIRST person who popped into my mind because of your mutual location (VERY close). There are several other rescue homes here in the midwest as well. Again, when you are ready.
_________________________
Minkasmom (Papillon Kisses)
Slave to:
28 gliders,
5 cats,
and ONE husband (can't handle two, lol!)
gangel Remembering all my lost loves cry

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#1160671 - 08/13/11 07:09 PM Re: When a duo becomes solo.. [Re: MissTiesa]
Sweet_Pea
Unregistered


That is SO sad I am very sorry for the loss of your baby I agree with these ladys you should get her a nother buddy not to replace but to be there to support her!

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#1160691 - 08/13/11 07:56 PM Re: When a duo becomes solo.. [Re: MissTiesa]
SGQ Offline
Glider Lover

Registered: 12/25/10
Posts: 524
Loc: Grand Junction, Colorado
If you need time to grieve then I agree you should take it~ but if you see anything alarming or depressing in your glider then a friend sooner rather than later would be beneficial. Maybe you can make arrangements? Maybe start making small payments towards a glider or a rescue now before you pick one out or decide to get one right now?
Eventually you'll need to get her a cage mate so when its time to do so you'll be ready and paid for~

When Thor died poor Twinkie was devastated. I kept Twinkie on me almost 20 hours a day until he got a friend. A wonderful person reached out to my Twinkie and I made payments towards a new cage mate. I wasn't ready for a new pet so looked at it as getting him for Twinkie rather than our family.. the last thing I did was pick which glider.. and really I didn't even do that, I had my husband pick out of pictures.
When I got that sweet baby home I fell in love lol~ he isn't a replacement for Thor~ but Zinger was a godsend to me and Twinkie and really brightened things when we needed it the most. Seeing Twinkie happy again and with a buddy to play and snuggle with was heartwarming.

I'm sorry for your loss~
hug2
_________________________
~~Chrystal~~
My beautiful pair~

Zinger (aka:Evan) :wfb:
Karma (aka:Ivy) :grey:

:rbridge: Thor 12/24/10
heart Twinkie 11/26/11

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#1160710 - 08/13/11 09:11 PM Re: When a duo becomes solo.. [Re: MissTiesa]
MissTiesa Offline
Glider Explorer

Registered: 08/21/10
Posts: 310
Loc: Chicago, IL
Thank you so much everyone.

Yeah I think I will get a new buddy for her when the time is right. At the moment, we both do need some time to grieve. I am keeping a close eye on Kiki though, to make sure she is eating normally and not getting too depressed. By the end of the month, I will probably need to adopt another baby because I am going to be starting school again full time, and I won't be able to carry her everywhere like I do right now.

I got in touch with Alden and she is going to help me find a new cagemate for Kiki. Hopefully it will all work out.
_________________________
Teresa, non-professional zookeeper.
1 dog-Tippy, 2 cats-Oreo and Jareth, 2 geckos-Zodiac and Palkia, 1 guinea pig-Critter, and 3 amazing gliders!
:glider: Kiki, Simba and Winry
gangel Nibbler (2008-2011) heart You will always be in my heart. Always.

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#1160711 - 08/13/11 09:12 PM Re: When a duo becomes solo.. [Re: MissTiesa]
MissTiesa Offline
Glider Explorer

Registered: 08/21/10
Posts: 310
Loc: Chicago, IL
hug2 and thank you everyone for all of the hugs. They are very much needed and appreciated!
_________________________
Teresa, non-professional zookeeper.
1 dog-Tippy, 2 cats-Oreo and Jareth, 2 geckos-Zodiac and Palkia, 1 guinea pig-Critter, and 3 amazing gliders!
:glider: Kiki, Simba and Winry
gangel Nibbler (2008-2011) heart You will always be in my heart. Always.

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#1161241 - 08/15/11 02:35 AM Re: When a duo becomes solo.. [Re: MissTiesa]
sugarlope Offline
Glideritis Anonymous

Registered: 03/28/02
Posts: 19735
Loc: in my happy place
I am sorry for both of you, on your loss. hug2

I think every glider handles loss differently just like every person. You know her best, I think she will let you know what she does/doesn't need.

I know of situations where the glider was comforted by keeping bedding that smelled like the passed cage mate for a while. I also know of situations where any scent of the cage mate seemed to make things worse for them (they were searching and this stressed them out, once the entire cage, and everything in it, was cleaned, they were fine). If she seems happy to be with you and you are comforting each other (which is sounds like you are) then I wouldn't rush her (or you) into a new friend just yet. I think you are right to make sure you are in the right place to bring in a new buddy. As I said, she'll let you know how she's feeling. sounds like she's feeling you are just the friend she wants around right now. hug2
_________________________
~Gretchen
Maia & Squish
If we never loved, then maybe we would never feel pain. Love anyway. It's worth it.

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#1161546 - 08/15/11 08:04 PM Re: When a duo becomes solo.. [Re: MissTiesa]
MissTiesa Offline
Glider Explorer

Registered: 08/21/10
Posts: 310
Loc: Chicago, IL
She does seem to be acting friendlier towards me now for some reason. I think she's trying to comfort ME. She may be even ready for a new friend, judging by how she's acting. But I'm certainly not yet.

I think she's enjoying having his scent lingering around in their pouch and cage so I haven't changed anything yet. But I will at the end of this week.
_________________________
Teresa, non-professional zookeeper.
1 dog-Tippy, 2 cats-Oreo and Jareth, 2 geckos-Zodiac and Palkia, 1 guinea pig-Critter, and 3 amazing gliders!
:glider: Kiki, Simba and Winry
gangel Nibbler (2008-2011) heart You will always be in my heart. Always.

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#1164748 - 08/22/11 09:24 AM Re: When a duo becomes solo.. [Re: MissTiesa]
BreezySam Offline
Out of Pouch

Registered: 01/28/10
Posts: 76
Loc: Virginia
I'm sorry for your loss! I lost one of my gliders a few months back.
After Baby died I took Micca the vet and had him checked out and fecaled. The vet said he was healthy and his fecal came out clean.He did lose some weight and he started over grooming his tail a bit.

I also kept his cage the same for awhile. Not wanting to further stress him out by taking her scent away.
I increased the time I spent with him at night since he was alone and I brought him to work with me during the day.

I did wait alittle while before finding him a new cagemate (about two months). After I introduced him to Tipsy his weight went right back up and he is now leaving his tail alone.
_________________________
Mother to
Micca :grey: Tipsy :wt:
Boomer :wfb: Blondie :wfb: and Kiara :grey:
Baby :rbridge:

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