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A new mommy and need some advice! #1406558
01/16/17 08:47 PM
01/16/17 08:47 PM
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 7
KY
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Rednlizzy97 Offline OP
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Rednlizzy97  Offline OP
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Hey everyone! I'm so thankful I found this site:) I got my babies last Saturday and I feel like I've made some progress bonding but now I'm kind of unsure of what to do next. I have one male and one female, siblings, 12 weeks oop. The first 2-3 days I left them alone to let them adjust to their new home...they were skittish and ran away when I approached the cage (especially the female) but have since gotten a little more comfortable. Every time I walk in the room or open the cage I say "you're ok" to warn them that I'm approaching...and they really only crab when I move their pouch if they're in it. I've been feeding them treats at night, they'll take them from me but run away to eat them. They both have licked a little bit of honey off my finger. I've been wearing them in a bonding pouch for a minimum of 2-3 hours for the past 3-4 days. And they hardly crab when they're in there...the crabbing is definitely lessening even when I move their pouch. So I feel like I'm making some progress. How should I proceed from here? I don't want to move too fast for them, but I really want to feel like I'm making substantial progress. I haven't even got to pet them yet...they won't let me touch them at all, even if they're busy eating a treat. I know a week is not long, but I keep hearing stories of people being able to hold their babies within 2-3 days of getting them and it kinda makes me feel like I'm maybe not doing enough. I don't place my hand in their pouch because I know they will crab like crazy and I don't want to stress them out, I really want some bra babies and the breeder I purchased them from says they were with her, but how do I put them in my bra when they protest so loudly if I open their pouch? I ordered a tent and I'm just waiting on it to get here, so I'm hoping that will help them be more comfortable around me. Any advice would be greatly appreciated! I want my babies to love me !

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Re: A new mommy and need some advice! [Re: Rednlizzy97] #1406559
01/16/17 10:02 PM
01/16/17 10:02 PM
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 3,656
SW Missouri
Ladymagyver Online content
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Ladymagyver  Online Content
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Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 3,656
SW Missouri
:welcomegc:
So far you are doing great!

2-3 days sounds like an awful short time.

sounds like they have been human handled oop which puts you way ahead.

They do need to get used to you and your smell. Have you got any fleece you can wash (unscented soap, air dried) cut into 4 or 5inch squares?

Toss them under your sleeping pillow or in your dirty clothes hamper, or just rub on you, place a couple in their sleeping pouch. I go a bit further still and do this with their cage set and pouches. They will sleep with your smell and become accustomed to your scent. Change out blankies every 2 or 3 days. They will mark over your scent. The easiest time to do this is while they are out playing eating.

Everything in your home smells different than their old home.

It is normal to snatch a treat and run.Fiona does this to get away from Dot. Fiona doesn't like to share treats.

Is your male neutered?

Gliders will eventually tolerate being held a short amount of time, it's better in the morning when they are about ready for bed with hands during their awake time.

As far a bra baby, I would wait till your bonding is a little further along, or you can get a bra pouch that zips closed so you won't have to worry about any mishap. I trained Fiona first once we bonded, and Dot just climbed right in after Fiona.

Until you get your tent, you can clean and baby proof your bathroom, low light, toilet seat shut and let them jump off and on you. Expect a face hug or two.


Dawn

https://www.facebook.com/uptilldawngliders/

Be patient,
and
Trust your journey....




Fiona :grey:
Dot :grey:

Stewie :rtmo:
Re: A new mommy and need some advice! [Re: Ladymagyver] #1406561
01/16/17 10:32 PM
01/16/17 10:32 PM
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Rednlizzy97 Offline OP
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Rednlizzy97  Offline OP
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Thanks for the advice!!! I've been placing fleece with my scent in their pouch at night, but that's really all I've been doing other than keeping them in a bonding pouch for a few hours and feeding them treats at night. Is there anything else I should do to speed the bonding along? Thanks!

Re: A new mommy and need some advice! [Re: Rednlizzy97] #1406565
01/16/17 10:56 PM
01/16/17 10:56 PM
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 3,656
SW Missouri
Ladymagyver Online content
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Ladymagyver  Online Content
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This will sound a little crazy, but sit and read softly or sing to them while they are in their cage. When you enter the room, softly announce yourself, just so they know you're there.

When you pull their dishes out in the morning, talk to them, and softly rub the underside of their sleeping pouch, if they crab, shush them, and keep it up, tell them you'll stop when they quiet down. It's sort of a training for them to learn you aren't going away just because they crab. Always try to have the last word.

How do you feel about sharing their bonding pouch with your fist? - Coined as " fist time". This is done during their sleeping time. I'm going to try to find the link to a topic called " The Fist prevails".


Dawn

https://www.facebook.com/uptilldawngliders/

Be patient,
and
Trust your journey....




Fiona :grey:
Dot :grey:

Stewie :rtmo:
Re: A new mommy and need some advice! [Re: Ladymagyver] #1406567
01/17/17 01:42 AM
01/17/17 01:42 AM
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Posts: 7
KY
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Rednlizzy97 Offline OP
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Rednlizzy97  Offline OP
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Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 7
KY
That's a good idea! I'll def start reading to them! And I try to announce myself before I enter the room...they've gotten better about crabbing, I think it's my female mostly only when I pick up the pouch but even then it's not nearly as bad as it was the first few days after I got them. My male is definitely the friendlier one...my female is so skittish. And I've heard about people putting their hands in the bonding pouch, but honestly that scares me to death! Putting my hand into a dark space, not knowing when/if they'll bite me...I'll be a nervous wreck! Lol

Oh and I just noticed you asked if my male was neutered! Yes he is:)

Last edited by Rednlizzy97; 01/17/17 01:44 AM.
Re: A new mommy and need some advice! [Re: Rednlizzy97] #1406574
01/17/17 05:01 AM
01/17/17 05:01 AM
Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 1,413
Belleville, IL
Hutch Offline
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Hutch  Offline
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Joined: Nov 2015
Posts: 1,413
Belleville, IL
If you're still nervous about putting you hand in to the pouch, it isn't time to do so, yet. You being nervous will make them defensive.

When they're willing to come to your hand without a treat in in for a sniff (without a nip), then you'll be find to start putting your hand in the pouch without much worry. As Dawn said, start with "The Fist" as one of our crazier GC members (ComradeFluffy) dubbed it. It'll prevent your furbabies from being able to get their mouth around anything. You'll be able to transition from that to an open hand, but all of this will require patience (& a lot of soft, reassuring speaking).

Enjoy the experience!

Last edited by Hutch; 01/17/17 05:03 AM.

- Hutch

:plat: Arthur :wfb: Gwynevere :bb: Merlin :grey: Morgana

The epic saga begins here!
Re: A new mommy and need some advice! [Re: Hutch] #1406576
01/17/17 09:35 AM
01/17/17 09:35 AM
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 7
KY
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Rednlizzy97 Offline OP
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Rednlizzy97  Offline OP
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Ok I'll wait until I'm a little more comfortable then start placing my fist in their pouch while they sleep! I have still yet to get bitten so I think it's the anticipation of it that makes me nervous lol not the bite itself, I wish one of them would bite me and get it over with! Lol

Re: A new mommy and need some advice! [Re: Rednlizzy97] #1406580
01/17/17 12:04 PM
01/17/17 12:04 PM
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 3,656
SW Missouri
Ladymagyver Online content
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Ladymagyver  Online Content
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Posts: 3,656
SW Missouri
Disclosure: I just proof read this, so read all instructions a few times before you commit to trying "The fist". But I know you can do this... you want more with your babies, right? Or maybe wait till the tent arrives. Play it safe?
:thumb2:

When you make a fist, it tightens up all your skin. There is literally nothing to bite like Hutch said.

Pull them out sleepping pouch and all and have a seat somewhere quiet and comfortable like a couch in front of the TV (volume low or at least low action on TV). (Or in the middle of your bed, maybe a chair by their cage for your first attempt)

Talk or sing softly while you -
Slowly introduce your fist inside, keeping to one side or the other. They will grab it with their hands and feet, sniff and lick it. Leave it in there, they shouldn't crab at it at all once it's in there and settled. Close off the top to prevent escapees with your other hand.

Once everyone is settled, carefully slowly open your hand and scoot it under them at first. They will try to move your fingers around, but shouldn't bite ( forgot to mention, wash your hands with unscented soap first).

To be honest, it is very unsettling to put your hand in a dark place, but you already know what is in there. (Easy now, these are only little fuzzbutts that weigh less than the pouch they're in.)

But once you're in there and they settle down, find their sleeping spot, it it quite a cool feeling( cannot find words to describe, but maybe exhilarating! cloud9 ). Since they are so young, they may like sleeping under your hand, just turn your palm down over them. It's kinda like a ballet when everyone including you move untill all are happy and comfy. Give what ever is touching your fingertips a light scratch. And then rest. No quick movements. Alll slow and fluid.

Find your zen... relax... be determined... consistant...patient... and committed...


In general:

Each glider is unique in personality. Every member of a colony has a job or place in the colony. You are the alpha. Your male is the beta. Your female is scared out of her wits. But will observe what her male reacts to.

In the begining, don't feel bad if one gets more attention than the other. Work with the one that reacts with you. Let the other one watch.

Ok I'm stopping here I have given you too much stuff to think about...

Remember find your happy place. Your zen... Once you've bonded, your babies will become your zen... Good things don't happen over night, and you must work for what you want.

So you probably feel like :tant2: but once you've accomplished it, you will be like :jump2: :hdance: :lshower:


So, :gluck: and keep us posted on your bonding progress thumb


Dawn

https://www.facebook.com/uptilldawngliders/

Be patient,
and
Trust your journey....




Fiona :grey:
Dot :grey:

Stewie :rtmo:
Re: A new mommy and need some advice! [Re: Ladymagyver] #1406582
01/17/17 03:38 PM
01/17/17 03:38 PM
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 7
KY
R
Rednlizzy97 Offline OP
New Member
Rednlizzy97  Offline OP
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Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 7
KY
Thank you sooo much! I'm going to try this today and I'm feeling optimistic! Thank you again! This really motivates me:)

Re: A new mommy and need some advice! [Re: Rednlizzy97] #1406586
01/17/17 07:04 PM
01/17/17 07:04 PM
Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 22
OK
Pasley Offline
In Pouch
Pasley  Offline
In Pouch

Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 22
OK
Red,
i am new too.. so i know where you are coming from. I've had my boys about a week. Everyone on here is so helpful and understanding. I have never had gliders before so everyday is something new for me.

I am scared aswell.. I can not help much, i am still a trainee LOL.. but i am here if you want to talk.

Thank you Lady for the advice. I will try the fist in the pouch. It is crazy how something so small can make something so big, so scared lol..

Re: A new mommy and need some advice! [Re: Rednlizzy97] #1406590
01/17/17 07:41 PM
01/17/17 07:41 PM
Joined: Oct 2014
Posts: 3,656
SW Missouri
Ladymagyver Online content
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Ladymagyver  Online Content
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Posts: 3,656
SW Missouri
:urwelcome: But... Also like Hutch said, they know you're scared too. Don't try this unless you feel evrybody is ready.

Remember this should be done during their sleep time. Not just before they wake up for the day. There may be a scratching fit to get out of the pouch.


Dawn

https://www.facebook.com/uptilldawngliders/

Be patient,
and
Trust your journey....




Fiona :grey:
Dot :grey:

Stewie :rtmo:
Re: A new mommy and need some advice! [Re: Pasley] #1406598
01/17/17 08:47 PM
01/17/17 08:47 PM
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Posts: 7
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Rednlizzy97 Offline OP
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Rednlizzy97  Offline OP
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Joined: Jan 2017
Posts: 7
KY
It really is funny how intimidating 4 ounces of fur can be!! I'm finally starting to get a little less scared when they start crabbing!! Lol! I've had my babies a little over a week as well, it seems like I'm making progress but they are no where near being bonded to me yet! Good luck to you! Hopefully we can both be brave!

Re: A new mommy and need some advice! [Re: Ladymagyver] #1406599
01/17/17 08:48 PM
01/17/17 08:48 PM
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Rednlizzy97 Offline OP
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Rednlizzy97  Offline OP
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Thank you so much Ladymagyver! You've been a big help and I'm going to use your advice!


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